Paterfamilias

The peculiar layout of our temporary office accommodation means that New Boss inhabits his own office, around the corner and at a safe distance from the hoi polloi. I pass it on my way to our equivalent of a water cooler (grimy kitchen, sink, cold tap) and espy him within, door firmly shut, tapping away at his keyboard with a tight-lipped expression.

Coincidentally, this very day I have been mulling over New Boss's repeated insistences to me, during the first few weeks of our acquaintance, that we should all be one big happy family.

Light dawns !

Goodness me, I have been extremely slow-witted. New Boss never intended this to mean "a close knit unit whose members are bound together with strong and lasting ties". No, no, no....

What New Boss obviously meant me to understand was that he planned to sit in splendid isolation from his staff, rather in the manner of a Victorian paterfamilias, and leave the day-to-day management of the children to Mother and the Nanny. Except that he's forgotten these roles were abandoned the day that Senior Female Manager was unceremoniously shunted off into premature retirement.

As a result, some of his children have spent the past 2 years running amok, and now specialise in tearing the wings off butterflies, and balancing buckets of water above doors to crash down upon unsuspecting passers-by.

Oh where is Mary Poppins when we need her ?
Where is Nurse Matilda ??
Where, oh where, is Nana ?!? (because frankly, even a Newfoundland dog could do better at keeping us in check than the likes of Line Manager and Spiteful Manager)

I've got quite a collection of children's books at home, and quite often re-read them at times of stress. Opening the pages, I can be transported to Wild Cat Island, the Blue Door Theatre, or the Land of Green Ginger within seconds - which is a lot quicker than most mood-altering chemicals and has FAR fewer side effects...

But as I make my way back from the kitchen, balancing my plastic cup of water, I reflect that several of my absolute favourite books have a very similar theme.

They are the ones where the children run away from home.