Contrariwise

As part of my renewed resolve to meet difficulties head-on, I have now emailed Personnel agreeing that I will go ahead with the intended mediation between myself and Line Manager, provided that it happens prior to the one year anniversary of the Horrible Incident which led to the final fracturing of our relationship.

 

How changeable! I hear you cry. How contrary, how perverse, how very inconsistent.

 

Well, yes. I can see why you would think that.

But having reflected over the weekend, I have determined to try and do the right thing.

 

Personnel reveals an unexpected Real Woman side, swiftly taking exception to my casual aside that it is a shame my employers decided not to pay for mediation 2 years ago when I first asked them to do so. She pointedly informs me in response that the Council was always willing to pay for mediation.

 

???

News to me !

 

I send Personnel an email saying it is great to know that my employers are such believers in mediation, and that I would be very interested to know on how many occasions over the past 5 years the local authority has paid for mediation to resolve staff conflicts? There is a long silence before Personnel responds, letting me know that they have - um - never previously paid for mediation.

 

I rest my case.

I mean I really do rest it, as I resist the impulse to respond.

Because I have realised all over again that "engagement is futile" !

 

I have also realised that Line Manager is never going to change. He is never going to give me adequate support, he will never manage to give praise where praise is due, and he will never respond to at least 50% of the emails I send him; including those which require a prompt response. Even in the current circumstances (post-grievance, all meetings monitored, both of us carefully watching our Ps & Qs) he still hasn't responded to my week-old request to apply for a short training course, or bothered to set up our next meeting !!!

 

Does he do this because he is a bastard? No.

Does he do this because he hates me? No.

Does he do this because he is lazy? No.

 

He does all this because he has never behaved any differently, and no-one has ever given him any reason to change. He represents an organisational problem; but not one significant enough to prevent him racking up decades of secure employment and a whacking great pension. He ticks enough boxes to keep himself in a job, and to expect him to be good at the "people side" is obviously an ask too far.

 

He's a man of 60+ in a dinosaurial local authority.

Nuff said.

 

By 10am the next morning, the date for mediation has been set.

I put it in my diary.
And then I try very hard to stop thinking about it.