Occupied with Occupational Health

We're having another office-wide meeting next week. It was attending this meeting three months ago which forced me to confront the fact that I was not quite "over" the experiences over the past year - a continuing frustration to New Boss, who keeps saying to me in tones of marked irritation "I think you just need to move on"...  (for blog post "Little Wobble" giving an account of that meeting click here ...)

I've been obsessing about the next sodding meeting for months (seriously!). It's  being held in yet another part of the Borough, and so I don't know what the layout of the room is going to be, who is going to sit where, and whether I am going to be able to get through it without once again being seized by crippling anxiety.

Fortuitously, I have forgotten that this week I am due to have a meeting with Occupational Health Doctor - and when I open the email reminding me, I do a little jig of joy.

OH Doctor is a pleasant woman of about my own age, and though I have long since renounced any real belief that she is ever going to do anything to help me, for a few seconds I entertain a wild fantasy that she is going to write a report recommending to New Boss and Personnel that instead of attending the meeting, I be allowed to sit in an ante-chamber sipping a cup of Earl Grey, and listening to Bach while having my feet massaged.

Oh well.
It's nice to dream.

I explain to OH Doctor that I am still finding some aspects of my working environment very difficult, stressing that it is not the work itself; simply particular situations and configurations of people. We talk for approximately 45 minutes, during which OH Doctor says "I have given you my leaflet about stress management, haven't I?" and I say "yes, thank you".

I clearly recall this leaflet because it started with the helpful advice "try not to worry". It is currently languishing on a local waste disposal tip, or possibly by now is already on a slow boat to China where it will be recycled into something really useful.

 At the end of our session, OH Doctor dictates the following report which will be sent to Personnel:

"I have discussed with Ms Ross a number of possible options which she may find helpful. I have advised her to see her GP to discuss the possibility of taking a small dose of a beta blocker prior to attending a meeting that she anticipates she will find stressful. I have also suggested that she considers attending the Employee Counselling Service again or undergoing more in depth psychotherapy. I have provided her with details of courses run by Anonymous College, which are designed to help individuals feel less stressed. Ms Ross already has information regarding stress management and local mental health initiatives to help combat stress. In addition, you may wish to consider whether Ms Ross would benefit from participating further in mediation with the various individuals she has difficulty in working with."

So there we have it !

Instead of deciding to undertake a root and branch review of the Council's ghastly and ineffectual Codes and Policies, or to look at how employees who assert their right not to be bullied in the workplace might be better supported, the answer is to label said employees neurotic f***-ups who have to be doped up in order to get through their "normal" (I use the term loosely...) working day !!!

OH Doctor is also convinced that my reaction to the experiences of the past year denote some deeply buried neurosis which can only be uncovered through intensive psychotherapy. Her considered medical opinion is "zere iz usually somezink in von's PAST which triggers zese extreme sorts of reactionz.....".

I should, of course, have responded: "well, you know OH Doctor, everything in my past taught me that if you told the truth, everything would be OK" - but as you might imagine, by that point I just wanted to get the hell outta there. Particularly when she started suggesting that once again I be locked in a room being placed under intense pressure to be "friends" with people who have done their utmost to make my working environment a total misery (Anonymous Council's interpretation of Mediation...)

In full-on Stepford Employee mode, I politely thank OH Doctor for her time; and apologise once again for having been 2 minutes late for our appointment. I shake her hand and exit, clutching another selection of her "useful" pamphlets and leaflets.

As I leave the Town Hall, a handily placed bin catches my eye.
Splendid!
That's another 50g of prime grade paper on its way to China.