It's Staff Survey Time Again !

The results of our latest ("this time we are Really Really Serious About It") Staff Survey have been published on the intranet. The results are bad ! The workforce is demotivated and demoralised !! Satisfaction ratings have dropped from 70% to 40% in two years !!!

Heck, I could have told them all that for free.

Maybe I should volunteer to be a Case Study? Because two years ago I was acknowledged to be the highest performer in my department; a status reflected in my annual Performance Pay and even a Special Recognition Payment. These days, sadly, I am jaundiced to a deep shade of ochre. But I am actually grateful for the experiences I have had over the past year (a depressing saga I can't be arsed to rehearse even on my own blog - even though at this point in time NO-ONE  IS READING IT BUT ME...!!)

Yes, I am grateful. Because if these things hadn't happened, I might still be working a 60 hour week, chasing the occasional pat on the back from senior managers (doled out in the manner of a City Boy throwing a couple of quid to a Big Issue seller), seeking affirmation and identity through my work, and neglecting every other aspect of my life despite these all being so infinitely more deserving of my time and attention.

But it's OK now.

I've finally woken up and smelled the coffee.

This week I attend a Feedback Session about the Staff Survey results along with about 80 other members of staff from across our Directorate. Gosh. Not a bad turn out - and it turns out that everyone has plenty to say. The Chief Executive, who appears to have initiated this exercise, wears an affable but determined expression; our Director has obviously been practising his solemn expression in the mirror. My New Boss happens to be sitting right in my line of vision - and golly! He looks positively grim.

Hmm. He may now be regretting his words to me - during our third meeting - that he had no intention of having one-to-one discussions with staff (something I suggested we all might find helpful) because he would only be communicating with the two managers below him. "That is what a hierarchy means" he helpfully informed me at the time. Saved me looking the word up, so that was jolly useful.

Yes, he may well now be regretting his insistence that he would be establishing a rigid hierarchical structure -  and possibly also the fact that ever since he arrived he has kept his office door firmly closed in the face of all his staff - because our Director is now using words like 'transparency' 'communication' 'acknowledgement for work well done' and 'transformation'.

Bloody hell. We've forgotten what those words mean. Maybe a dictionary will come in handy after all !

I am wearing a dress. Colourful, short, feminine. Almost "floaty" if I swirl round fast enough (not to be attempted unless in the safety of one's own home, obviously). I sit at a table near the front, and manage to get through all the presentations without heckling. From time to time I even remember to smile.